ok, so what u might not know about saddam hussein is that he really lieks his BDSM sex. liek, so much that he would totally do it involuntarily on people. i'll tell u somethin, smoking pipes of afghani opium and then hitting the crack pipe had a strange effect on saddam; he just sorta chilled out but became real detached about breaking peoples' ribs one at a time. i mean one time he had these dudes who were totally fucking sodomized with really sharp objekts, and i mean, do u really expect that guy to be able to shit after u shoved a cactus up the dude's ass? i mean come on, that's just fucked. but i mean, he lieked 2 torture ppl for fun, and since he was dictator he liek didn't need consent, he just had a bunch of dudes he randomly fucked in the ass secretly and they would round up ppl who were just tryin 2 mind their own business. then he'd offer them a crack rock and they would be too scared to turn it down; and so they'd be really high on crack while this dude is workin them over with all this medieval torture shit. he'd have his sons come over and we'd pass the pipe back and forth and take turns hitting dudes in the knees with a cricket bat. torture and crack cocaine really go well together; it's commonly known that crack makes u totally want 2 slowly kill a guy sometimes.

but dude, saddam had a total bottom side to himself, he was a switch, he'd be tied up with a ball gag and there was this special spot on his back he'd tell us to hit with teh blowtorch, and that was some grisly shit but he'd giggle liek a schoolgirl when u got it. he'd humiliate himself by watching the movie Hot Shots: Part Deux and then totally do the part where he puts his face on a bug zapper. in fact, they didn't do this in the movie but he put his penis on the bug zapper and he'd keep rubbing it against it until the flesh started melting off of it while we're hitting him on the back with a cat o' nine tails...dude was crazy. anyways, he was kind of a dangerous guy but i wasn't afraid of him, obviously he couldn't withstand my interdimensional superpowers. so anyways that's saddam, he liked his opium, his blunts with powdered freebase...he liked 2 kill the pain and then try 2 get the pain goin' as much as possible. dude never douched before we had our iraqi gay sex orgies tho.